Today is the first official day of Summer Break. To speak the common language, I’m supposed to say Eliott graduated from Kindergarten yesterday. However, her K-12 school does not actually hold a “graduation” ceremony, for which I am not so silently thankful. As I look at so many cap-and-gown clad Kindergarteners plastering the proud parent pages of Facebook, I silently wonder, again, about the priorities in our country. Forgive me, all of my friends of recent six-year-old graduates. I realize you really had no choice in the matter. Also. I agree that your child looks very cute. Cute like dressing up in a wedding gown is cute. Yes. It is actually cute.
I sat down in the back of my Sunday school class, toting the boy, juggling coffee, purse, and breakfast. A visitor to the class (a young teenager) smiled at Isaiah and then said, very sweetly, “Is this your first Mother’s Day?”
I was flattered. I laughed and said, “No, this is actually my third child.” Before she had a chance to be embarrassed I added, “No seriously, thanks, I know. Don’t I look good?”
If it is possible to have pride without being arrogant, I’ll call it that.
If it is possible to be confident without being full of myself, I’d like to claim this one too.
John to Me: Does this shirt make me look like I’m trying to be 18?
Me: Why, because it says Abercrombie?
John: Yes, or because it’s so tight?
Me: No, you look good. It isn’t too tight. Seriously. Leave it, we have to go.
Carter: Daddy, you wearing you nipples today?
John: Nevermind, I’m changing.
“Well, we could choose apple juice, milk or water. And this girl in my class said, ‘Everyone who chooses apple juice only can be my friend.’ So I chose milk. But guess what, when we got to the Life Center, she was still my friend.”
Somebody get this girl a D.A.R.E. Bear, now.
On Friday, an old friend from Washington state called me because he now lives in North Carolina. When my phone rang, I was parking my minivan to hold my place in the carline in order to expedite the process of picking up both children when one is released fifteen minutes earlier than the other on Fridays. I was parking my minivan in a long line of minivans, and tucking my four month old into a baby carrier so I could effectively use both hands to navigate my pre-school kid, her lunchbox, and all her art, back to the minivan before the elementary school carline started up.