Dear 45 year old Claire:
I assume you are reading this for one of the following reasons:
- Every woman in the house has PMS right now.
- Your daughter has a “boy issue” and has locked herself in her room after screaming how much she hates you.
- Your son and his friends just ate the dinner you prepared early, mistaking slow cooked ribs for his after school snack.
- One of the kids crashed the car.
- One of the kids crashed someone else’s car.
- The school found pot in the locker belonging to your child.
- You just found porn in the browser history of your laptop and your email is receiving non-stop unsolicited X-rated ads every hour.
- Nobody is listening to you.
The UnderToad 